By Sarah H.
Right around the time that I found out I was pregnant, my partner and I were also preparing to move to a new city where I knew no one. It was a tough pill to swallow, knowing that I wouldn’t have my best friends nearby. I had alway pictured my first pregnancy as a glowing, happy time where I would be showered with love and affection. Instead, I was pretty damn lonely and I ate a lot of mall pretzels dipped in sadness while I window shopped for baby clothes alone.
It wasn’t until after I had my daughter that I started meeting other moms through breastfeeding support groups. I was apprehensive about attending at first, mostly because I didn’t actually need the information about breastfeeding. My baby was a nursing champ. But I did need to be around other humans and it was helpful that they were all toting around diaper bags and struggling with life as a new mom just like me.
One fateful meeting, I met a mom who told me that she and her husband had always dreamed of opening their own restaurant. I told her that my partner was a chef and we had a catering business. We immediately hit it off. She was also new to the area, having moved just shortly after her baby was born. Her daughter was only three weeks older than mine and we both had no friends.
I didn’t realize at the time that this a common story. Moms meeting each other at breastfeeding and parenting support groups – clinging to the fragile life raft of socialization post-baby and unknowingly making lifelong friendships. We have deemed these friends “breasties.”
My breastie and I actually don’t have all that much in common, but that starts to matter less the older that you get. In high school and college, it is easy to make friends based on interests and common activities. As a parent, you make friends with people who understand how life changes when you have kids. Someone who will wait patiently for you to change your baby’s blown out diaper in the back of the car, because they know the ordeal all too well. Someone who will sit next to you at the park as you both unapologetically nurse your babies in public.
She was exactly what I needed when I met her and our friendship is still going strong even though our babies are now toddlers. She already has another baby and I’ll be the first one in line to give her a hand. She is someone who I can rely on and I’m so thankful I took the chance to get out and meet other moms.